Guarantee

There is none.

In life, when you say goodbye to someone, it could be for the last time. But it's different with Grayson. As I sit in the Sacramento airport waiting for my flight home I wonder if I will ever see him again.

Saying goodbye was awful. I lost it. I had held it together the whole trip (minus listening to love songs I attributed to him while at Tryphon). But in that moment giving him lots of kisses, I could not stop the tears. I told him to hang in there and that I would see him in March (for his 3rd birthday). And I WILL. His Mom made a comment on Saturday that she hoped he made it to 3. That is a thought that has NEVER crossed my mind. After 3, yes, every day will be a gift but I never fully realized that when it come to him, it's day by day.

I knew I had to stop crying before I got back in the car where his older brother was waiting. His Mom came in because she had to pee so that helped break up the sadness. I told myself to get it together; grabbed my things and off we went. I thought I might cry more at the airport. I thought about how people were going to be starring at me wondering what was wrong. I filled my sad thoughts with the Nerdist podcast which provided me much needed laughs.